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Nov 1 / Caro

Meh

Things went much better at the hospital today than two weeks ago.  I think perhaps I did succeed in making my point after all, and that standing up for what I believe in may have paid off. I certainly felt as though I were treated with a little more respect, at any rate. And somehow, I think I may be left alone to manage my blood sugars as far as possible. We’re all meant to be on the same team, but it feels like a victory of sorts, and even more so when I got through the entire appointment without a single tear.

The appointment itself, though, was a bit…. Well, meh. Not terribly bad, but really really not that great.

I described how Flangelina was definitely slowing down his or her movements in there. But it turns out that they are barely 1/5 engaged, and with that in mind the slowing down of movements could be a sinister sign. A vaginal examination (aka “a necessary evil”) did nothing to improve the outlook either, as I’m less than 1cm dilated and my cervix is still high and posterior (Holy TMI, I’m sure). In other words, nothing much is happening yet. On the one hand, this means that induction is looking pretty inevitable as I’ve now reached the golden 38 week mark in my diabetic pregnancy. On the other hand, inducing too soon may not be the best approach as there is more ground to cover from where we are now. It would have been a whole lot better news if we could have done an effective sweep and felt that things might start moving soon anyway.

But, after some discussion, we finally have a plan: Unless I go in to spontaneous labour before, I’ll be induced this coming Sunday, 6th of November. I’ll be 38 weeks and 5 days pregnant. Between now and then I’ll attend the hospital on a daily basis for cardio-tochography (CTG/fetal wellbeing check) and I’m to go in to triage if I have concerns about movement, or anything else, at any other point.

It’s a bit “meh” because I know how unlikely spontaneous labour is before the deadline we now have, and whether I’ve admitted it or not, that’s what I’ve been hoping for all along. It’s a bit “meh” because I’m not sure if all the sudden extra monitoring means I should be worried, yet they can’t be that worried if they’re willing to delay induction until Sunday. I don’t know what to feel really. Fear? Disappointment? Excitement? Or just not very much at all?

But by this time next week there is a very real possibility we’ll have a baby, or at least be well on the way. That’s what I’m going to focus on whilst I’m living in the hospital maternity day assessment unit for much of the week.

Come on baby, we’re nearly there!

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